twice rejected

i went to the blood bank again today. i got rejected again today. :( very upset. this time by a lousy 0.4. what the hell? gggrrrr... so now aeshon and i are even. our donations this year will equal 3 times each, inclusive of the one we'll be attempting in dec. damn you, haemoglobin, damn you.

i'm aiming to get on the 'tree of life' board which is for champion donors. ie. people who donate 50 times or more. i'm at a lousy 5 right now. *sighs* long way to go huh. if i donate an average of 4 times a year, it would take me 11.25 years to get to 50. i would be 35 by then. whoah. remind me to start popping them iron pills sometime in mid nov ya.

oh, i've started running on the treadmill. was dripping sweat all over the place. i love it. i could easily, happily get addicted to this. thanks sutha for forcing me to take that first plunge into the 8km/hr and above range.

i forgot i have a neighbourhood committee meeting tomoro night. i'm supposed to come up with an activity to do for next year. i can't think of anything remotely exciting. help me, somebody?

i'd like to thank my mum, my dad & all the little people i stepped on to get here

i would like to take this opportunity to thank my parents for bringing me up well. there is obviously room for improvement on my part but i think they did a great job overall. maybe a little authoritative at times but hey, it worked. they gave me the freedom i wanted and trusted me to do the right thing. they also didn't try to control me too much, cos i think if they did, i would've rebelled completely.

then again, i'm not that rebellious. within reason lah. like getting multiple piercings, occasionally staying out late and travelling. how tame is that. anyway, i wouldn't be who i am today if not for them so THANK YOU. (obviously i'm not gonna tell this to them face-to-face lah, aiyoh so mushy. i don't do mushy.)

what brought this on, u ask? well i was directed to the blog of an ex- friend by my friend and it chronicled her life thus far, being a twenty-something. she's living it up, partying, having a good time. do i feel like i'm missing out? a little. but at the same time, when i look back at everything that i have achieved thus far, no, i'm not missing out at all. got over the clubbing thing before i even got started properly. partly because i'm self- conscious and can't dance, perhaps. haha.

what i don't understand is why she is not over that kind of lifestyle. i guess i'll never know, being the good girl type. bad girls go everywhere? seems like it. not saying that i'm super good lah, but i'm not baaad. funny how the system can churn out completely different individuals even though we went through the same thing. once i become a full- fledged psychologist i'll conduct an experiment on personalities, environment and behaviour ok.

in the meantime i'll go think of a way to budget my pay so that it will allow me a holiday destination for next year. perth? melbourne? bali? germany? decisions decisions... or perhaps i should get started on my many projects. wahaha.

absolutely genius quote:
"i work for money. if you want loyalty, get a dog."
- hajar's msn nick

speaking of which, my batch will be meeting the ceo of our company on tuesday. wish me luck. i hope i won't seem too blase about him. i'm in this 'couldn't be stuffed' mood right now.

things that make you go hmm

first of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAJAR!! i hope fadzil brings you to al- hamra. hehe. if you hadn't already accepted his proposal eons ago, you would soo say yes if he did it there. after the meal, of course. :)

this morning i witnessed an accident. well, kind of. it was a split second kinda thing. i was looking out of the bus window, there were two bikes at the side, weaving in and out of traffic. the first one stopped then i heard a BOOM and an AARRGGHH! hmm or maybe it was more of an EEEKK! i dunno. anyways, i thought it was the bus's fault but the driver kept on going. so of cos being kepo i craned my neck to check out the commotion. apparently the second bike had hit the first one and sent the rider of the first one flying forward. so i didn't imagine it, i really did see a man flying. wow.

i also saw a mat/ minah ITE couple. the girl was short, fat and ugly and the guy was tall, fair and good- looking. like, what the hell? where is the justice in the world? i don't have anything against people who are short or fat or ugly but all three at once? oh man, you'd better have a(an?) high IQ, a great personality, a special 'talent' or a really big heart. seriously. maybe he's with her for her special 'talent'.

yeah. bite me.

anyways i'm going off to johor to do some grocery shopping. i'm gonna make sure there are lots of the good, healthy stuff in there. i tried kai lan in oyster sauce the other day. kavi has the evidence. i must say it was edible. if it's me saying a veggie dish is edible as well as being good enough to eat on it's own, you can be sure it was pretty yummy.

ferrous fumarate

this morning i did an experiment in the name of science and curiosity. i read somewhere that iron is best absorbed when vitamin c is also present. so i took my iron tablet with blackcurrant juice. later in the evening (the easily disgusted should stop reading right here) i pooped 'grey'. this is the term used to describe the colour (according to mooch) when you take in too much iron and your body gets rid of the excess. in actual fact it was actually dark green/blackish. wahahah. i can't believe i'm posting this. but seriously, sakit perut man.

oh and there was excess cos the tablet contains 200mg iron. maybe iron is difficult to absorb cos i think an adult needs only about 20mg or something. so they gave extra to make sure you get some at least? haha. kids don't try this at home cos you can suffer from iron poisoning if you take too much.

so yeah, the conclusion is that vitamin c does facilitate the absorption of iron. cos if it didn't then the excess iron wouldn't come out what, right? just my theory. haha. same thing happens when you take multivitamins. yr urine will be extra yellow cos your body will expel the stuff that it doesn't need/ has enough of. so there.

tomorrow i might try out the fact that calcium inhibits the absorption of iron. but i don't think i should cos i'm gonna donate blood on fri and i need my iron up... eh if this is the case right, then if u mix iron- rich milo with milk then how? will they cancel out each other? hmm...

weekender

okies its saturday again! i'm oh so bored... lucky i've got lots of blogs to read. hehe. so this morning i went to the gym... think i burned about 500 calories, but it could be more. my legs hurt. i'm tired. but it still seems like i'm not doing anywhere near enough to see a difference. dammit. i wanna do weights lah. cardio only just doesn't cut it. hmm wonder if i can convince suzie to do weights tomoro after body combat. i loooove body combat! kick ass man.

one thing that bothers me about the gym is the total lack of shame from most of the ladies in the changing room. like just now, there was this woman who was completely butt naked standing beside me and rubbing in her body lotion. like wtf?? your house ah? basket... i'm probably already scarred for life by the sheer number of naked female bits that i have seen this past month or so.

to the men out there- seriously, are you THAT enamoured? true, some great bodies but mostly normal lah. like nothing much what. and i have learned to appreciate my boobs more. buahahahah. mozzie bites sial some people...

this is probably the last weekend that i can relek one corner because i need to get started on the numerous projects that my group has to work on. bummer. we have some pretty interesting topics, so it should be pretty cool. very tight schedule though. oh well... caaaaaaan no problem.

so, plans for tomoro: kick ass in body combat, lunch with kavi and the girls. so far candida and yaya can make it but mooch and huda can't. haven't heard from shereen and aishah yet. hmm.

did i mention i'm tired? i'm tired. perhaps an early night today...

words of wisdom from you-know-who-you-are:
" never underestimate the stupidity of men"

throwing in the towel

ok that's it. i've had it. not gonna struggle to lose weight anymore. cos i figured, it's gonna be the same each and every damned year. i'll try to lose weight by raya, but doesn't happen, raya comes around, i'm miserable. i will probably always look like a bloody ketupat, especially if i go out with people who are petite/slim/everything else that i am not. i'm letting this go.

been working out regularly the past 2 weeks, but haven't seen any changes, even though i do feel better. it sucks. REALLY sucks. the frustration is just not worth it. i have been trying to change my diet too, cos i think that's where the problem lies. so i guess will see what happens. it does not help that i have the mentality 'i worked out therefore i can afford to eat more'.

the conclusion is that i'm just destined to be fat forever lah ah. whatever. will just continue enjoying my workouts and food. life's too short to worry about shit like this. fuck it. i exercise about an hour a day, 5 days a week. i'm watching what i eat. i don't have any unhealthy bad habits. i may not look it but you can be damn sure i'm pretty 'fit'. well fitter than skinny girls who smoke, drink, eat badly and don't exercise. so there.

status quo, goodbye to you. i'm through. i'm fucking stocking up on my wardrobe overseas.

bbq games

ok, so last fri, there was a batch bbq. what batch? well my training batch lah of cos. we were at east coast and i must say, that was some of the best bbqed food i've tasted in a long time. very well cooked. :) i was the official chicken wing skewer-er, cos i get them super straight, therefore they cook better. something about surface area and even-ness lah hor.

faisal made the early birds sit around in a circle and play games. luckily we didn't use the waterbombs. hehe. one of the games was pretty cool, first you had to tell 2 truths and a lie and everyone else had to guess which was the lie. then it was 2 lies and a truth, which one is the truth? mine were :

1. i have donated blood 10 times(L), 2. i have gotten napfa gold(T), 3. i am a grassroots leader(T).
1. i have gotten braces before(L), 2. i have had work displayed in an art gallery(T), 3. i hate jewellery(L).

the red ones are the real answers, the green ones were their guesses. i guess i don't strike anyone as being the athletic sort. :( or the artistic sort. :(
on the other hand, i look like a grassroots leader. :) and my teeth look like they've been enhanced. :) and actually i've donated 6 times. could've been 7 by now but noo... stupid haemoglobin. gggrrr.

so who wants to do the 2 truths and a lie, 2 lies and a truth? feel free, tagging my many readers. :)

i am it

ok got tagged by yasmine. woohoo! my first tag! hehe...

5 weird habits

i have kicap with everything. ok maybe not everything, but i have it when i'm eating rice. i NEED it. hand the kicap over and no one gets hurt.

i wash my feet obsessively whenever i get home from anywhere. and each time after i visit the loo or step outside the house. also before i go to bed.

if i'm eating fish i squish it to a pulp before eating it. this is due to the search for bones. had bones stuck in my throat before. twice.

i laugh hysterically at most things. i think it's a coping mechanism developed by my psych to deal with situations i get anxious about.

i used to wear jackets EVERYWHERE. yes, in hot, humid singapore. not anymore though. can't take the heat. and i look like an idiot.

ok i guess that's it. i really can't think of any interesting ones. but i bet the moment i publish this and go do something else, a thousand good ones will hit me. it's a human law. let it be.
i'm tagging rohana and kavi. urhm cos there's no one else i can think of. sedih sey!


on being stared at:
" they can't help it if i'm hot"
- anonymous

wow

ok i finally managed to access my old blog on friendster. it's like meeting up with a long lost friend... until i realised that it had only been 4 days since i got shut out. within the space of these 4 days, i set up this blog and posted like crazy. i officially have no life. no offence to regular bloggers out there. so the problem now- should i continue posting in friendster? or remain on blogger?

i need to thank rohana profusely for introducing me to the painful but necessary world of html. thanks girl! and also for being my only active reader. *sighs* actors don't perform to an empty hall and an unresponsive audience is even worse. hint hint.

so, training started today. if you will excuse me, i need to go do research on the insurance industry and check out their movers and shakers as well as read up on my general insurance lectures in order to decipher what the hell our project question means. sorry for the excessively long sentence.

pretty words of the day:
diamond dust
liquid eyes

oh ya, i AM NOT an insurance agent

*yawn*

i think that so far, i have given the impression that i'm some kind of food crazy, exercise hating chick who's probably fat.

that is not far from the truth.

for the good of everyone, i will be attempting to make my stomach smaller. might be one of those people who needs to get a silicon balloon or something inserted into my stomach thereby forcibly reducing the amount of food i can take in. but no, that is not an option! instead i will eat smaller meals frequently so that my excessively active stomach juices won't destroy my stomach lining and leave me with no stomach, as compared to the current distended one.

i am aiming to be about 58kg by the end of the year. this has been my goal for the past dunno how long. i have never been anywhere near reaching this goal. wish me luck, people.

p.s. the purpose of this post is to fatten up my brand spanking new blog. i'm sure i'll have more interesting things to say once training starts again tomoro. oh no, training starts tomoro. goodbye afternoon naps...

DIET is a 4- letter word

i was inspired by the al-hamra meal to go on a middle eastern diet. this would consist of copious amounts of meat, bread, milk, dates, nuts, exotic spices & condiments, as well as (shock, horror) veggies. this is the plan:

1. brekkie- goat's milk, bread with hummus/other veggie thingys
2. lunch- bread, meat, other veggie thingys
3. dinner- meat, other veggie thingys
4. snacks- dates, nuts, milk, etc.
5. desserts- UMALI

of cos i would need to walk the equivalent of crossing a desert/ taking the goats out to pasture/ drawing water, etc, etc in between these heavenly meals. otherwise i don't think i'll lose any weight. yes, i'm going into this plan in order to lose weight while enjoying my food. i'm hoping the presence of the veggie thingys will help. you can tell i didn't think this through properly.

i could always go on the diet that kavi recommended:

1. don't eat. or if you must, do it sparingly. who needs food?
2. smoke instead.

i don't smoke. and i don't have the discipline to say no to food. i'm sorry. looks like i'm gonna continue to look 3 months (only a few weeks, according to lian yi) pregnant. the price i pay.

on driving

bro: eh you drive home later ah, I’m sleepy.
me: I’m not going home, I’m going out.
bro: oh.
me: or I can drive u all home then I drive to orchard lah. But I dunno how to get there.
bro: easy what, I tell you. Take the PIE…
me: where is the PIE?

Kavi is going to help me get over my fear of driving in Singapore. I’m glad that someone has faith in my skills. Or lack thereof. I NEED a backseat driver. My sense of direction is non- existent too, so i'll need one of those navigation system thingys. which brings me to the next gadget i have my eye on- the hp pocket pc. costs a thousand over bucks. i don't have that kinda money, unfortunately. especially to spend on something that is very likely to behave like a normal pc. ie. unreliable, hangs, crashes, and makes your life a living hell frequently. no way. but i could use a navigation system. ok ok, i'll be happy with a map of singapore, how's that.

*groan*

yesterday i was gastronomically delighted. and i will be paying for it today by putting myself on detox. cos i didn't manage to wake up early enough to go to the gym. sighs. this was what my aunt served up for dinner:

1. keropok with a chili dip
   
2. sweet sour fish
3. tofu and egg
4. some other kind of fish
5. hot chili chicken
6. fried baby squids
7. some kangkong dish
8. some other veggie & beef thing
   
9. king prawns
10. chili crab
11. bread pudding
12. lychee smoothies

can anyone say 'mmmmmm'? i'm not usually a big fan of seafood but man, that was good. everyone was rolling around after that. hehe. the scary part was that i still had room for more and didn't feel the slightest bit overfed. i think my stomach is a bottomless pit. i have expanded it beyond repair. damn... somebody help me, help me please.

the chili crab was awesome. somehow i managed to get bits of shell and crab meat all over my pants and even in my hair. :s this would have been perfectly acceptable on any other occasion but i was going out to meet kavi, so i really could not smell like seafood. she would've been tempted to take a bite. haha. i got my cousin to pick the bits out so it was all good, managed to smell decent enough to go out.

i think singapore deserves its title of 'the city that never sleeps'. on the train at 11+pm, it was crowded. like super crowded. i was quite surprised. then again i shouldn't be, seeing how it was a saturday night. once i reached orchard, it was almost exactly like it was during the day. urhm except that the shops were closed and someone turned off the big light in the sky. the 24 hour macca's was packed. truly amazing. the good thing was that it was really easy to get a cab. by the time i got home it was 3.30am and it was a forgone conclusion that i would miss the body combat class that morning. *sighs*

Samedi

today (so far) has been both good and bad. i'm waiting for it to turn ugly.

i didn't manage to donate blood. that's bad. my haemoglobin levels weren't up to scratch, only a 11.4. you need at least 12 to be able to donate. oh come on it's only a 0.6 difference... but no. wasted trip sia. and to think i was stuffing myself with protein and meat and iron-y stuff all week. so now i have to load up on iron pills and milo before attempting again in 2 weeks' time. bummer.

aeshon and i were quite irritated with the doc who took our blood pressure and stuff before we took the haemoglobin test. he said he was gonna ask us 'personal' questions(individually of cos), so we're like uh ok. then he asked us about our sex lives. ha ha ha. what a total waste of time. both of us answered in the negative of course, but he didn't seem to believe us. kept asking 'so have you ever been in a sexual relationship?'. us, 'no'. him, 'never?'. us, 'nope.' him, 'never had sex before?'. us, 'NO.' i mean, dude, come on. is that so unheard of?? i know we probably look shaggable enough but hey... wahahah.

so aeshon was able to donate but i was rejected. rejected!! noooo... :(

on to the good part. yasmine, lian yi and i went to check out this restaurant at holland village called al - hamra. one of those expensive places i'd never set foot in, naturally. the meal was free cos yasmine needed to review restaurants for a guide she's writing up. they 'll reimburse her. the food was absolutely fabulous.

so at first, we didn't even see the restaurant even though our cab stopped more or less right in front of it. i only noticed it cos the sign was in arabic-ish writing that looked nothing like 'al-hamra'. it was absolutely blazing hot in the road but inside the restaurant it was sweetly cool. we got the front table with the cushy seats and view. yay!

we had a platter of appetizers, a platter of main courses and a platter of desserts. the appetizers were pretty good i guess. for a person who hates veggies and who actually enjoyed the eggplant and chickpea hummus and parsley tomato thingy, i say they did a good job. for the main course we ordered seafood, chicken and lamb. it came in a huge covered brown dish and it looked so damn good when the waiter took the top off with a flourish. the seafood was tasty, the lamb tender and the chicken absolutely succulent. everything just kinda melted in your mouth when you ate it. took very little effort to chew and even less effort to enjoy. excellent. for dessert i had the umali- bread and bits of fruit and nuts in milk. it was warm tasty mush. they made mush taste good. unbelievable. mmmm..... there was also an assortment of other dessert type things but the umali... man...

i'm very tempted to move to the middle east and get some woman to adopt me and feed me. it was that good. or perhaps i should just learn how to make middle eastern dishes. pfft, nah... too much effort.

Greetings

a big hello to the handful (i'm being optimistic) of people who actually bother reading my blog. i had to move cos i was forbidden access to my own blog for a few days. so i threw a hissy fit lah, dowan to use friendster blogs anymore. hmph...

anyways, i'm waiting for aeshon to pull herself together so we can go donate blood. its 10 am already. i need to meet another friend at 12. it would take about an hour to get to the blood bank and about another hour (give or take) to suck the blood out. running on a tight schedule yes.

ok i'm gonna go do my hair again. even though i have learned that nothing i do will ever make it behave. oh well.